The Mothers Who Redefine Motherhood

In my 13 years of paediatric dentistry practice, mothers of differently abled children have always been inspirational.

Past Hajj days were days of introspection. The values we hold, belief and trust and also, family. My thoughts kept going back to these inspirational mothers and fathers.

A few days ago, a 12-year-old boy with a condition called “Achondroplasia” came in for treatment. He appears much smaller than his age. His hands and legs curled up, he bounced while he walked. On a hearing aid (deafness), unable to speak, treating him on the dental chair was not easy.

I felt every moment, stretching myself to the best and most gentle way to finish his session. Throughout, his father remained calm and encouraging, even though I could see deep sadness in his eyes.

As soon as we were done, the child started speaking in sign language. Baffled, I asked his father what he was saying — fearing silently he was telling his father I had hurt him. His father said — “He is telling you that he will bring his best friend here and get him checked by you.” I looked back at the boy and saw him smile proudly. His innocent smile meant the world to me.

I have come across mothers who are the definition of motherhood. They give — without truly expecting return.

As children grow up, they become more independent.

After an age, they leave.

Mothers receive these shifts with mixed feelings — you miss them, yet don’t miss the physical exhaustion.

But for mothers of differently abled children it is different.

They do not see this in the near horizon — for them the future is long and unknown, fearful and tiring.

Although — I am yet to hear them complain, “why this child for me?” Rather, what always deeply touched me is their unconditional love and hope in their child.

Many times these mothers feel guilt, are blamed by others, have no one to take care of these children so they can take a break.

Schooling doesn’t begin in a straightforward way, holidays are not the same, travel may seem long and dreadful — many things others take for granted.

We need to be more sensitive, genuinely supportive and less judgemental as a society towards them.

What they need is not sympathy — but a wholehearted backing. To feel they are included, and that they and their child matter and are part of progress.

If you know such an amazing mother, send this to her.

And if you are an amazing mother reading this — we are proud of you. You ARE the inspiration for Motherhood.